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New Linux User Declares Self Safe From Coronavirus


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securitybreach

Normally, I would just post a snipped of the article but this was too good to not paste it all.

 

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New Linux User Declares Self Safe From Coronavirus

 

By Staff Writers

 

new-linux-user-declares-self-safe-from-c

 

With an enthusiastic yet very obviously relaxed demeanour, local man Bruce Kane told reporters on Saturday that he was in no way concerned about Coronavirus, AKA COVID-19.

 

Speaking to reporters from a safe distance of ten meters, Mr. Kane, a recent Linux convert, said that he “had no idea what the fuss was about”.

 

“First of all, why are you guys standing so far away from me?” he said. “But anyway, everyone keeps going on about this new virus. But who cares. Everyone knows only Windoze users get viruses, why should this be any different?”

 

We had for obvious reasons requested the interview with Mr. Kane be conducted via video link or VOIP, but he had declined, telling us that since his migration he couldn’t get the Linux version of Skype to work with his microphone. Upon suggestions of alternative applications, he declined that option too.

 

“Look, honestly I’m still getting used to even using the package manager. I also spent ten days in my bedroom just trying to exit Nano,” he had told us. “I’ve subsisted on nothing but Cheetos and Coke for two weeks now, but I finally got a usable desktop going.”

 

When reporters asked if he had been self-isolating, he replied “What’s that? Do you mean like chroot jails? I’ve been reading about those.”

 

When asked about the distro he was running - “Oh, Arch Linux. I spent two hours using Ubuntu but that felt too mainstream. I heard Arch was pretty cool, so here I am. Plus, I figure

 

it’s even safer. Don’t ask me to explain it, it’s just the vibe of the thing.”

 

So, what’s next for Bruce Kane?

 

“I’ll probably install Gentoo soon. Like, tonight. I mean Arch is still kinda popular and this Coronavirus thing seems to be trending a bit. I feel like I’m probably ready for that now

 

(Gentoo). I mean how long could it take me?”

 

We wish Mr. Kane the best of luck with that.

 

#StayHomeInstallGentoo

 

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V.T. Eric Layton

I'm so glad I knew enough not to take a swallow of my drink whilst reading this. I would have hated to spit bourbon all over my mechanical keyboard. ;)

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V.T. Eric Layton

For sure. It would have been a waste of good bourbon and it would have fried my keyboard. I toasted the last one by spilling coffee on it. ;)

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securitybreach
3 minutes ago, V.T. Eric Layton said:

For sure. It would have been a waste of good bourbon and it would have fried my keyboard. I toasted the last one by spilling coffee on it. ;)

 

AS long as you do not short out of the board, you can usually take a mechanical keyboard apart and soak the PCB and switchesin rubbing alcohol.

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3 hours ago, securitybreach said:

 

AS long as you do not short out of the board, you can usually take a mechanical keyboard apart and soak the PCB and switchesin rubbing alcohol.

 

I missed a heartbeat when I read that, but then realised you speak American and not English. :) I consider rubbing alcohol to contain some oil -  Wikipedia says in England it is commonly castor oil and wintergreen oil which I would be hesitant to put on electronics. In the US apparently it doesn't necessarily but must contain stuff to make it undrinkable -

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To protect alcohol tax revenue in the United States all preparations classified as Rubbing Alcohols (defined as those containing ethanol) must have poisonous additives to limit human consumption in accordance with the requirements of the US Treasury Department, Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms, using Formula 23-H (8 parts by volume of acetone, 1.5 parts by volume of  methyl isobutyl ketone, and 100 parts by volume of ethyl alcohol). It contains 87.5–91% by volume of absolute ethyl alcohol. The rest consists of water and the denaturants, with or without color additives, and perfume oils. Rubbing alcohol contains in each 100 ml more than 355 mg of sucrose octaacetate or more than 1.40 mg of denatonium benzoate.tyl ketone, and 100 parts by volume of ethyl alcohol). It contains 87.5–91% by volume of absolute ethyl alcohol. The rest consists of water and the denaturants, with or without color additives, and perfume oils. Rubbing alcohol contains in each 100 ml more than 355 mg of sucrose octaacetate or more than 1.40 mg of denatonium benzoate.

 

In Australia we can buy 99.8% pure isopropyl alcohol which I use regularly for cleaning. I asked the shop what the other 0.2% consists of and they said it's probably water as 99.8% is as pure as can economically be distilled.

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securitybreach
17 minutes ago, raymac46 said:

You had me right up to the point where he was planning to install Gentoo. :hysterical:

 

Right, lol

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V.T. Eric Layton
15 hours ago, securitybreach said:

 

AS long as you do not short out of the board, you can usually take a mechanical keyboard apart and soak the PCB and switchesin rubbing alcohol.

 

Nah... on the last one, it was on when I spelled the coffee on it. It fried. Cleaning it wouldn't have done any good at all. :(

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