Corrine Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?"Customer: "Hi, I'd like to place an order."Operator: "May I have your NIDN first, sir?"Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610."Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Which number are you calling from, sir?"Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?"Operator: "We're wired into the system, sir."Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas."Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir."Customer: "Whaddya mean?"Operator: "Sir, your medical records indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice."Customer: "######. What do you recommend, then?"Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it."Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something ! like that?"Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion."Customer: "All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then."Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your your kids, sir. Your total is $49.99."Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number."Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit."Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here."Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's overdrawn."Customer: "Never mind. Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?"Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're out getting the cash, but carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward."Customer: "How the ###### do you know I'm riding a bike?"Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid up.Customer: "@#%/$@&?#!"Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop."Customer: (Speechless)Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?"Customer: "Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke".Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics."Author Unknown Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guitar Man Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Very close to reality, regardless of take-out joint...Even scary... I guess their Online Service should be up & running soon too... Bon Appetit ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ibe98765 Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Ummm, they can already get your name & address from your telephone number now. The only question is who is actually making the call... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freddy Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 I've gotten that already. I call up and they tell me my name address and phone number. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LilBambi Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Gee and I came to this topic to order a pizza! LOL!Almost too real Good one, really enjoyed it despite the scary thoughts behind it ... thanks for sharing it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cluttermagnet Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Wow! Spooky! Sounds pretty close to the present day. They just have not yet got it quite so integrated. Also, at present time, only the federal gov't can get away with this sort of stuff (see Patriot Acts 1 & 2). Convergence applies to more than trying to meld cell phones with the internet and computing, etc. Convergence can also refer to that ultimate melded data base the gov't dreams of. T.I.A. and all that 'good' stuff. Where it stands today? The Attorney General himself said during an interview that they have all the different data bases accessible from within a single room. The sole remaining obstacle is that they still have 'parallel feeds'. In other words, in that situation room, the have representatives of the various agencies manning their own personal terminals and they can all individually respond to an info request by addressing their respective data bases simultaneously. That is supposedly the remaining extent of any 'firewalls' between various data bases at this point. Someone please correct me if I got this wrong, but that is my understanding of the present state of affairs, as basically reported on the six o'clock news. The sole remaining step is to see if they can finagle their way into just melding all the data bases. We're talking the works here- financial, educational, insurance, medical, work, credit card, department and supermarket purchases, draft and military sevice, criminal record, if any, watch list info if any, and on and on and on. We're almost there, folks.BTW I had not heard of any of these pizza house shenanigans, as I'm too cheap to choose their overpriced pizzas (unless someone else is paying) I buy pizza shells with minimal topping and jazz them up myself. Peppers, more cheese, bacon, mushrooms, garlic- whatever. Mine are almost as good as the pros. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LilBambi Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 (edited) Ah! Homemade pizza! We do our own too Cluttermagnet!Jim makes homemade dough, and the sauce. I cook the meat or slice the pepperoni, slice up the onions, green peppers, mushrooms (preferably shiitaki (misspelled intentionally because it has one of those words in it LOL!) when we can get them at a decent price/look), and grate the cheese. Then I put it all together and cook it. We make a good team. Lots of fun making it. Edited January 10, 2004 by LilBambi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ibe98765 Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Trader Joe's has the best personal pizza's! 10 minutes to cook and they're a lot more tasty and cheaper than commercial stuff... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cluttermagnet Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Ah! Homemade pizza! We do our own too Cluttermagnet!Jim makes homemade dough, and the sauce. I cook the meat or slice the pepperoni, slice up the onions, green peppers, mushrooms (preferably ****aki when we can get them at a decent price/look), and grate the cheese. Then I put it all together and cook it. We make a good team. Lots of fun making it.Good deal, Fran-You guys are good- making your own shells and all. Yum! I'll be right over... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cluttermagnet Posted January 9, 2004 Share Posted January 9, 2004 Trader Joe's has the best personal pizza's! 10 minutes to cook and they're a lot more tasty and cheaper than commercial stuff...Thanks, ibe-We are lucky to have a local TJs within 5 miles of here. I am in there fairly often, and they do have some good stuff and good prices that keep me coming back. I will look for those pizzas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peachy Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Yes, homemade pizza is the way to go. I've got a really great Sicilian Pizza Dough recipe that works great in the breadmaker. Mix ingredients, program dough setting and then you have 90 minutes to get your toppings in order: typically in our household we top it with potato slices, broccoli bits, caramelized onions, feta cheese and oven-roasted red peppers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LilBambi Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Cluttermagnet, LOL! (BTW: Did you notice my edit? LOL!)Peachy, sounds delicious! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cluttermagnet Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Cluttermagnet, LOL! (BTW: Did you notice my edit? LOL!)Peachy, sounds delicious! Of course I noticed. I'd never thought of those delicious mushrooms as being vulnerable to the Cursemaster 2000 anti- profanity software, but then we're usually smarter than our software, right? (usually) Reminds me of the time I saw this little minitruck made by Mitsubishi ahead of me at the gas station, some years ago. It was a brand new one, white in color, and the brand lettering was emblazoned across the tailgate in fairly plain block letters in gloss black. Some wit had taken a roll of black plastic electrical tape and carefully added one more letter at the end of this long Japanese name. That's right, the letter was a "T". I about split a gut when I saw that. Good thing I wasn't rolling. I might have steered it into a ditch, I was laughing so hard. BTW I have some of those lovely shiitalkies upstairs right now. Seriously. Never tried 'em on pizza. I guess i ought to. I consider them such a delicacy that I usually just pan fry them- sauteed in a little olive oil. A little salt, a little pepper maybe, and they are heavenly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cluttermagnet Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Yes, homemade pizza is the way to go. I've got a really great Sicilian Pizza Dough recipe that works great in the breadmaker. Mix ingredients, program dough setting and then you have 90 minutes to get your toppings in order: typically in our household we top it with potato slices, broccoli bits, caramelized onions, feta cheese and oven-roasted red peppers! Aw, jeez-You guys are making me so hungry I will probably go upstairs later and fry up some peppers and some of them shiitalkies and make myself a mini pizza with extra cheese. I am Homer of borg- you will be assim- oohhh, pizza! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linuxdude32 Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 That's hilarious! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Paracelsus Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Trader Joe's has the best personal pizza's! 10 minutes to cook and they're a lot more tasty and cheaper than commercial stuff...Thanks, ibe-We are lucky to have a local TJs within 5 miles of here. I am in there fairly often, and they do have some good stuff and good prices that keep me coming back. I will look for those pizzas. You Folks should thank your Lucky Stars!!!One of the things I miss most about SoCal is Trader Joe's I use to shop at one of the "Original" Stores in Placentia. You could hardly navigate a cart though that place with all the great stuff They closed that one down and opened a "Super Store" in Brea in '92(?), about a half mile from my Condo.There is something like TJ's in Dallas...But that's an hours drive for me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ibe98765 Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 For all of those who have been to a Trader Joe's, it's the best little grocery store around!Go here to check if there is one near you:http://www.traderjoes.com/locations/index.aspTJ's isn't real savvy on the net, so their web presence is a bit dysfunctional. You need to click on the dropdown on the mid-right side and select your state there.You can go here to read their flyer and see some of what they offer:http://www.traderjoes.com/fearless/index.aspBefore I would move, I would have to check how close the nearest TJ's was! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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