Guest LilBambi Posted February 29, 2004 Share Posted February 29, 2004 LOL! Good thing this is the BAD Advice topic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted February 29, 2004 Share Posted February 29, 2004 Do you have keys to these empty houses? :devil:Do you think they will mind? :whistling:Need I say anymore? Of course I have keys! What kind of neighbor would I be if I didn't??? Besides how else can I check on them in emergencies?? I have keys, know where all the circuit breakers are located and when they are expected back. Do you think they trust me? I just can't figure out how to use all the places at once. I thought maybe I would tell them I was making sure it looked like the houses are lived in and not closed up for the winter. :)Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pc-tecky Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 hmm.. how to occupy them all at the same time... what's that? a multi-house block party? oh what a great idea.... :-P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 1, 2004 Author Share Posted March 1, 2004 You don't need advice...you need a valet! Just the same, I'll slap on my thinking/alien-mind-control-prevention cap and see if I can come up with anything not already posted. Don't hold your breath! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trigggl Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 You don't need advice...you need a valet! Just the same, I'll slap on my thinking/alien-mind-control-prevention cap and see if I can come up with anything not already posted. Don't hold your breath! So Jeber,Is it the Apple that's the thinking part of the cap?If I stick a banana on my head, will it prevent aliens from controlling my mind? Does the effectiveness wear off when they turn brown?-------------------------------------On a side note, you accidentally gave some good advice. You should have told Julia to hold her breath. Don't mention it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LilBambi Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 Hey Jeber, wouldn't this one work better??http://www.stopabductions.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trigggl Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 Hey Jeber, wouldn't this one work better??http://www.stopabductions.com/ I don't think that one comes with the "thinking" option. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 JeberI am still not holding my breath. Do I need to do anything differently???Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 2, 2004 Author Share Posted March 2, 2004 Uh, no, you're fine...just keep breathing. I have been contacted by representatives of a foreign civilization...a very, very foreign civilization...who might wish to lease those unused driveways from you to use as landing sites. I'll let you know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 2, 2004 Share Posted March 2, 2004 Do they need a clearance from above? I will have to decide which ones have the best aerial clearance. Some are definitely out - too many trees and too short. Hmmm.Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 3, 2004 Author Share Posted March 3, 2004 They assured me that "short" is no problem, as all their crafts are VTOLs. The trees they deal with like the wheat fields they make circles in...just flatten 'em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ross549 Posted March 3, 2004 Share Posted March 3, 2004 Jeber.....can you introduce me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LilBambi Posted March 3, 2004 Share Posted March 3, 2004 Julia! I can see another whole section of your website coming soon! Pavement and Sand Circles on the OuterBanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 3, 2004 Author Share Posted March 3, 2004 Jeber.....can you introduce me?Um, sure. Ross549...you. You...Ross549.(do you feel you know yourself better now?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 3, 2004 Share Posted March 3, 2004 Jeber.....can you introduce me?To whom do you want the introduction? The visitors or me? :DJulia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 3, 2004 Share Posted March 3, 2004 Julia! I can see another whole section of your website coming soon! Pavement and Sand Circles on the OuterBanks! The question would be how long will they last before they disappear by the tide? Oh, you mean on my street. Hmmm. Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ross549 Posted March 4, 2004 Share Posted March 4, 2004 Jeber.....can you introduce me?Um, sure. Ross549...you. You...Ross549.(do you feel you know yourself better now?) Well, that worked. I know who me is now.... if, in fact, the me that you introduced me to is the real me. Is it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 4, 2004 Share Posted March 4, 2004 If you are confused as to which is the real you, just look to your avatar for directions!Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 4, 2004 Author Share Posted March 4, 2004 The real you just went thatta way------->Ooops, no, thatta way<------------- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 15, 2004 Share Posted March 15, 2004 JeberHelp! I need advice. Spring is coming. That means summer is around the corner. That means the tourists will return. What do I do with all the houses in the neighborhood? The owners will all come back and expect everything to look great. There is a new pool two doors down but it has not been filled. Should I hook up their hot water to it and fill the pool so it will be ready for them?Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 15, 2004 Author Share Posted March 15, 2004 Two words...bucket brigade. Don't you all live near the ocean?OK, perhaps you don't have enough help to form a line that long. In that case, visit any local hotel/motel. Borrow one of their fire hoses (visit late at night, they're hanging in the hallways...don't get caught borrowing) and put one end in the ocean and the other in the pool. Get a friend with good lungs and a big mouth to start the syphon for you. When the pool's full, pull the end out of the ocean first. Simple. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pc-tecky Posted March 15, 2004 Share Posted March 15, 2004 Why not just borrow a fire truck or two? They will have all the equipment you'll need, pumps, hoses, ladders, and so much more. How can you go wrong with that? Uuhm, just a few words of advice, don't get caught, don't go too fast, don't go too slow, and don't use the lights and sirens as they'll locate you and the truck in a few short minutes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 15, 2004 Author Share Posted March 15, 2004 Good concept, but let's go one step further and remove the danger...start a fire in the pool and call them to come put it out. Don't let them stop until the pool is full. Strain the debris from the fire off the top of the pool, and bingo! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trigggl Posted March 15, 2004 Share Posted March 15, 2004 Even better idea, sneak into the station and swipe a firehose. Connect it to the firehydrant yourself. Locate a large pipe wrench and turn it on.Who knows, the station could be throwing an old hose out.While you're at it, start a car wash and raise money to buy your own pool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 15, 2004 Share Posted March 15, 2004 But I thought if I used their hot water then I could start swimming outside!Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FuzzDuckie Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 When's the pool party?:::new kid on the block:::: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeber Posted March 16, 2004 Author Share Posted March 16, 2004 Welcome to the forums, FuzzDuckie. You're now an official Highlander. And as such, we can let you in on a little secret. Don't tell anyone else, because a non-Highlander may be using a parabolic antenna to overhear you. Everything you read here is bogus.I know, I know...it looks so believable. Well, we designed it that way. But it's all a gimmick. That pool, it's virtual. We have some of the web's best designers here in the forum. So all I'm saying is...don't dive in head first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 Everything you read here is bogus.I know, I know...it looks so believable. Well, we designed it that way. But it's all a gimmick. That pool, it's virtual. We have some of the web's best designers here in the forum. So all I'm saying is...don't dive in head first.Does that mean I am virtual too? Can I get a virtual assistant to teach my classes for me? You mean the pools aren't real? I wondered why there was no water! _________________Julia, who is not very gullible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ross549 Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 [temmu rolls toward pool with wheelbarrow full of..]hey! hey you!what are you doing in my yard?!?![temmu skedattles as fast as his webbed feet allow]*catches temmu with a net*So THAT's where all the quacking was coming from!Sorry, Temmu..... this pool is for penguins only....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacher Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 Julia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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